


Galaxies' whispers

by wavydanrises



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Angst, Established Relationship, M/M, Space AU, astronaut!phil, i know this is not how space works btw, just a sad fic really
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-03
Updated: 2017-07-03
Packaged: 2018-11-22 20:04:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,593
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11387433
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wavydanrises/pseuds/wavydanrises
Summary: Phil is an astronaut, Dan is his boyfriend and his “earth buddy”, and his mission is to make sure he’s good and safe, and space is unpredictable.





	Galaxies' whispers

Dan knew that Phil's job was more important to him than anything else. It was his childhood dream, the thing he fought to achieve for years. Besides, it wasn't as if he was constantly taken by the job. They were separated for months on end, but they also got to spend months together without being too bothered, seeing at how even Dan's job was quite accommodating. But, hey, that's what you get for dating an astronaut. And really, Dan was okay with that. He knew it mattered a lot to Phil, but he also knew that he loved him and they could be okay. 

 

Dan was never very far anyway, even when Phil was in space, it was his job to keep an eye on him. Literally. He was the guy supposed to have daily check-ups during every mission, who often had a visual on him, and tried to prevent him from letting the loneliness become too intense. That was how they first knew each other actually, via pixelated videos and bad quality phone calls. At least, the quality had slightly improved since then.

 

They’d been together for 5 years, almost 5 and a half, and Dan had decided that this mission would be the last one before both of them had a ring on their fingers. He planned on proposing as soon as he could, once Phil would be back on Earth. That was what he decided on their last night before Phil had to go. The mission would last 4 months, and he fully intended to have things ready by the end of the 122 days he’d have to spend on his own.

 

On most of Phil’s missions, he was either alone or just with another person, and this one was no exception. He’d be by himself for 4 months, and to say Dan wasn’t scared would be lying. He was always scared, to a point where he was wondering how soon he would start having grey hair. And he was still way too young for that, that’s what he told Phil every time he was about to leave, and the answer he got never changed. “You could always dye your hair,” Phil always said. “I’d be the only one to know, and I promise I wouldn’t blew up your cover.” and Dan was certain he fell a little more in love with him each time.

 

 

_ Day -1 _

 

“God, I’m so in love with you,” Dan whispered the night before Phil left, during those quiet late hours when they were just waiting to fall asleep. He tightened his embrace around him. “Promise me you’ll be fine.”

Phil chuckled. “Of course I will. Just like every other time. And I know you’re there to save the day if anything goes slightly wrong, you and a whole team. Being up there is the safest I could ever be, believe me.”

Dan groaned in disagreement, but didn’t say anything. He knew how important it was for Phil.

“And,” Phil spoke up again after a while,” you know what’s my favourite thing about being in space?”

Dan shrugged. “Scaring the hell out of me until you come back?”

“You wish,” he laughed. “If I listen closely enough when all is quiet, I can hear the galaxies whisper.”

Dan propped himself up on an elbow. “No you can’t. That’s not possible, and you know it.”

“I can! Well, not me actually, but the recording things can.”

“The “recording things” oh my god are you sure you’re even qualified to leave?”

“I’m the best, and you know it.”

“Ok, ok. What are the “whispers” like, then?” Dan asked with a smile.

“I can’t explain. I’ll see if I can record it, and I’ll bring you the recording when I get home. Deal?”

“Deal.”

 

 

 

_ Day 7 _

 

“It’s your first week in space! Well, we both know it’s not your actual first, but it is for this mission. How are things today?”

Phil smiled on the screen and, fuck Dan missed him already. He was lucky he got to be the only one in the communications room during the daily check-ups, except if there was an emergency, he could already hear the comments of the rest of the team on how cheesy they both were.

“First week out of 17, woohoo! Only 16 more to go. Remind me why I decided to leave, again?”

“Because it’s your actual dream come true and you shouldn’t miss such an opportunity for anything ever. Not even me.”

“I love you.”

Dan smiled. “I know, I know. But that’s not the point of this conversation and you know it, I’m going to get in trouble if you don’t tell me stuff regarding your situation.”

Phil shook his head. “Everything’s okay, I haven’t noticed any irregularities whatsoever. It’s all perfectly fine up here. I even got to catch some of those whispers I was telling you about!”

Dan could see the excitement in his eyes, and he laughed. “No you didn’t, you’re just saying that to mess with me aren’t you?”

“I’m not! I wouldn’t dare waste resources just to mess with you, who do you think I am?”

“You know you’d do it if you had the chance.”

Phil smiled sheepishly. “True. But I’m not!”

“You’re impossible.”

“Quit being mean and go back to work, Dan Howell, before they take you off this post for being too mean.”

“You’re the least professional astronaut, you know that?”

“Only when you’re around,” Phil chuckled. “That’s why you love me.”

“Fair point.”

 

 

_ Day 54 _

 

“Hello my dear Dan, what earthly news do you have for me today?”

“Really? “Earthly news”? You’re the worst.”

“Hey, that would be a great newspaper’s name! I think I’ll do that, once we get in touch with other civilisations and all that stuff, I’ll create “Earthlynews” and it will talk about all the weird stuff that’s always happening down there. Aliens will see how cool we are.”

“So that’s your plan for the near future then, create a newspaper about the earth and destined to aliens. I’d read that,” Dan said.

“Of course you would. Even if you’re not an alien. You’d be my number 1 fan. In fact, we’d probably own it together. You’d be the pretty face helping to sell all of them to all the aliens.”

“Ok, let’s get back on track before we go too far in this. Anything you’d like to say?”

“Nothing in particular,” Phil shrugged. “Every system is a-okay, all the stats are normal, no problem anywhere. There are a few rocks passing by, a bit more than usual, but I don’t think they’ve hit anything.”

“Alright,” Dan nodded. “I’ll ask if someone can run a test, just to be sure the outside hasn’t suffered any damage and I’ll give you the results tomorrow. Works for you?”

“Yep, that sounds great,” Phil smiled. “Thank you.”

“That’s what I’m here for, sweetheart. Okay I’m sorry, I have to go catch someone to run that test before they leave, so we can have the results tomorrow. It’s probably nothing, but let’s be cautious anyway. I’ll see you then? Love you.”

“I’m not going anywhere love,” Phil laughed. “Love you too.”

 

_ Day 78 _

 

“Hello, my dear! Oh Phil, you don't look too well today. What's happening? Is something wrong?”

The smile Phil gave in return was almost physically hurting Dan, it was laced with so much sadness.

“No, I'm alright, don't worry about me.”

Dan frowned. “Hey, it's my job to worry about you, remember? Both as your “earth buddy” as you call it, and as your boyfriend, by the way. So, don't just say you're fine, please. If something's wrong, tell me what I can do to fix it.”

“I know, you always have my back, it's just… there's not much you can do now, I guess. I just- I don't think i want to do this again. Going up here, I mean. I think, maybe that'll be my last mission.”

“But you love this! I mean- if that's what you want, then I'll help you however I can. But you've told me how that was your dream as a child, and I know how important it is for you. Are you sure about this?”

Phil closed his eyes, pressing his hands against them. 

“No. But I-I, I don't think I can do this anymore. I don't know. I miss you too much. I didn't really remember how it was and, especially on a mission where I'm alone like this, I have way too much time to think. And, I don't know. Maybe I've been with the stars for long enough now, maybe I should just spend more time with you, without being in freaking space for months. And, yeah maybe I’d miss that too, but… I don’t know. I just miss you. A lot.”

 

Dan’s hand closed around the tiny box in his jacket’s pocket, the tiny box that hadn’t left him since he bought it. Well, technically it was not the box he had bought, but rather what was inside it. 

 

“We’ll talk about that more when you get back, alright? I miss you too. Only a few weeks more and you’ll be there. Then we’ll be able to think about that. Anything new about the mission that you’d want to say?”

“No, nothing to report.”

“Okay well, that’s good. Hang in there, alright? You’re almost back. And you’re in space, enjoy it while you’re there! You’re living the dream, dude, especially if it’s the last time.”

Phil smiled, more frankly than before. “Thank you. I love you.”

“Love you too.”

 

 

_ Day 106 _

 

Dan rushed into the communications’ room. Another member of the team, Thomas, came to get him, saying that Phil was reaching out to them. And it was way before their check-ups’ time. Dan could feel how his heart rate was too fast. Really too fast. He opened the doors and ran in front of the screen, where Phil could see him.

All the team’s members were here.That was bad.

Phil seemed too distracted, looking somewhere else, to notice he had arrived.

“Phil, hey, I’m here, what’s going on?”

Phil looked up and Dan’s heart skipped a beat. His eyes were so full of fear he could’ve started crying right then and there. He grabbed the box in his pocket, as something to help him ground himself. He needed all his concentration, and more importantly he  _ had _ to stay calm to get him out of here. They could handle this, whatever it was.

“Phil. What’s the situation?”

“Pressure is too low, I don’t know what happened, it dropped slightly during the night so I was going to tell you later but it’s gone down by 20% in a few hours and I can’t figure out why, I’ve tried- I’ve tried figuring out the sources but…”

“Ok, Phil? I need you to stay calm love, we’ll figure this out. It’s going to be okay. Lena, I need you to run an emergency test. Phil, how are the other stats?”

“Everything’s dropping,” he mumbled. “It’s dropping faster and faster. Dan, I think-”

“No!” Dan shouted, cutting him off. “You promised, you  _ promised  _ you would be alright, I am not letting this happen!”

His grip on the box was so tight that his fingers were starting to hurt. There was no way this was happening, not so close to the end of the mission, and not during what could be the last of Phil’s mission. He refused to believe it. He took a deep breath.

“Lena, do you have some results yet?”

“Yes, the first results are here. The outside has been damaged, there is a hole, approximtely 1 millimiter wide as we speak. And it is getting bigger.”

“How long until something bad happens?”

He couldn’t tear his eyes away from the screen, from Phil. A tear escaped from his eye, floating strangely in front of him.

“15 minutes until complete pressure drop. 7 until there is no oxygen left.”

“Greg, find me something,  _ anything _ , to stop this.”

“Dan, there’s nothing I can-”

“ _ Anything! _ There must be something, there has to be something we can do! Lena, could he fix the breach?”

She shook her head sadly. “He can’t reach this place. I’m sorry, there is nothing-”

“Stop telling me that! I am not letting him die. That is  _ not _ happening!”

“Dan”, Phil spoke softly. “Dan, love, it’s over. You know it. You can’t do anything from here, and I can’t do anything either. It’s over. I’m sorry, I love you, and I’m so so sorry. I’m sorry I ate all your cereals the day I left, and I’m sorry I left socks everywhere all the time, i hope you know you were the love of my life and i would’ve given anything to spend the rest of my days with you.”

Dan opened his mouth, but couldn’t let out a single word. They were both crying at this point, and if Dan had been able to pay attention he would’ve noticed that everyone else in the room had tears in their eyes, even if they were trying to give them some privacy.

“I was...oh god I can’t believe this is real, I was going to propose. After you were back. That’s-That’s mostly what I’ve been taking care of when I wasn’t in here. I found the ring, and… and all that stuff.”

“4 minutes of oxygen remaining,” Lena warned them, her voice quivering slightly.

“Do you have it? The ring, I mean,” Phil asked after covering his face for a second. Dan nodded. “Do it. Please, do it. I want to be able to say “yes” and I mean it, please that’s the last thing you can do for me.”

Dan nodded once more, and quickly wiped the tears on his face before getting on one knee, and pulled the box from his pocket.

“I won’t do a long speech because I hadn’t prepared one yet, you know how I am.” Phil laughed a little at that. “And besides, we probably have like 3 seconds remaining and I can’t waste them. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me and I would’ve liked nothing more than growing old with you and be one of these annoying couples that have been together for ages. I am so in love with you and I doubt I could ever not be. So, Philip Michael Lester, will you marry me?”

Phil was crying more than Dan had ever seen him cry by now. “Yes,” he managed to say.

Then the screen went black.

Dan scrambled up to his feet. “Phil? Phil! What’s going on?!”

“Video connection died,” Thomas said. “I can’t get it back.”

“Thomas, get him out. I have 2 minutes of oxygen left. Please, don’t let him be there.” He already had much more trouble to talk.

“No no no no no, let me stay I’m not going anywhere, Phil let me stay!” Thomas was already dragging him to the door, and he was crying too much to really be able to resist. “Phil!”

“I love you, Dan.”

That’s the last thing Dan heard before the doors shut and he collapsed on the floor.

A while later, that seemed an eternity, the doors opened again. He was sat against the wall, a blanket around his shoulders and Thomas sat by him while he was still sobbing uncontrollably. A simple head sign from Lena, Greg, and the other team members that were leaving the room were enough to say everything.

It was over.


End file.
